Day 64 – The invited image
Day 64 – What is the image that woke you up this morning? Was there residue from your dream? Or perhaps
when asked about an “image” what emerges is a sensation, of the dog’s soft fur
under your palm, of her beating heart when you pick her up? Or perhaps it is a
song, or a gesture, or an impulse you have to move a certain way, or smell a
familiar waft—the air reminding you of that someone or someplace special? The invitation to imagine is not always
welcome. For some, it only cracks open
the door that tightly protects from past or present harm. For some it is a
demand, when what is wanted is a gift or glass of water.
Photo by Dan Cook on Unsplash
The invitation to play with ideas, or materials, with memories, or dreams, with images or sensations is an essential part of expressive arts therapy.
A palette of grief
For so many years
it was only fear
heart-pounding
gut-wrenching
ear-ringing fear
not just as a child
of touching
and not being touched
of the cold, hard buckle
and the sweat freeing grind
of the emptiness
and the gag
not just as a child
my days were spent smiling,
pleasantries, and a helping hand
sometimes mine
the generosity of play
and superficiality
of learning how to pretend
not just as a child
to know more
than the smell
of hypervigilance
“Just keep trying”
move forward
eat, sleep, listen to the news
even a false self
takes effort
even in exile
my fantasies are
of running away
not just as a child
wait –
are or were?
What of the days now?
when I
can be alone
and still feel
I am loved
this is new
and yet
they lay alongside
I lay alongside
the days
all of them
when I still jump
if the spoon drops
when I still cozy up
to that familiar
dread
and when I remember
what will never die
and yet was never alive
5/25/22
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